By Khabar Rojana 
Think gossip is toxic? Science says otherwise. A new study reveals gossiping with your partner can build trust, happiness and even improve relationships.
Gossip usually gets a bad rap! People who enjoy gossiping are unfairly painted as petty, negative chatterers who whisper behind someone’s back. But what if science told you it could actually be good for your relationships? New research says exactly that.
A study from UC Riverside titled “Spill the Tea, Honey: Gossiping Predicts Well-Being in Same- and Different-Gender Couples” has revealed some interesting things about gossiping. The study claims gossip can strengthen bonds, boost happiness, and even improve relationship quality, not just in romance, but in professional spaces too. Let’s get into the details!
Couples who gossip together stay together
The study followed 76 same-gender and different-gender couples in Southern California. Using a device called the Electronically Activated Recorder (EAR), researchers captured snippets of their daily conversations. Turns out, couples spend about 38 minutes a day gossiping, and nearly three-quarters of that is with their partner.
Interestingly, woman-woman couples gossiped the most and also reported the highest levels of happiness and relationship quality. The takeaway? Gossiping with your partner could be less about tearing others down and more about feeling like a team.
Why gossip works as emotional glue
Think about the classic “drive home from the party” chat: you and your partner rehash who said what, who looked stunning, and who seemed tense. According to the researchers, this kind of exchange isn’t just idle talk: it’s bonding.
“Negatively gossiping with one’s romantic partner on the way home from a party could signal that the couple’s bond is stronger than with their friends at the party, while positively gossiping could prolong the fun experiences,” the authors wrote.
In other words, gossiping creates a shared perspective. It reinforces trust, signals alignment, and gives partners the sense that they’re “on the same team.”
Gossip as a social tool
Beyond romance, gossip may also act as a “social regulation tool.” Talking about others positively or negatively sets the tone for what’s acceptable and what’s not in your circle. In relationships, that can translate into greater harmony, as both partners shape shared values and expectations.
Busting the myths about gossip
This isn’t the first time UC Riverside has challenged stereotypes about gossip. Back in 2019, the same research team found that women don’t gossip more than men, nor do lower-income people gossip more than wealthier ones. In fact, gossip is universal, and much of it isn’t negative at all.
The latest study builds on that finding, showing that gossip is a natural part of human connection. And when shared with a partner, it can actually be a sign of closeness.
So the next time you and your partner start whispering about your co-worker’s dress or your cousin’s awkward joke, don’t feel guilty. According to science, those conversations are less about others and more about strengthening your bond. Gossip, it turns out, may be the secret ingredient to happier relationships, romantic or otherwise.